I recently lost a very dear friend of mine. Felt like I got hit with a rock. The nauseating pain inside that just wont go away. The BREATH that I forgot exists.
After the emotion, the body is the first to react, then the mind asks questions.
The big Why? Why was such a pure soul taken from us? Why did this happen now? Why are the children left without a mother? Why is the husband left without his wife? WHY?
The first thing I did after crying was BREATHE.
That very breath that we come into and go from this world.
The simple act of breathing is what brought me back to my awareness.
That same evening, I asked to connect to her. And she came to me in a dream.
I barely recall what I dreamt that night but I woke up in the middle of the night with a gasping BREATH as if I was reborn. My eyes were wide open and I felt her. She said she was at peace. I returned to sleep.
The following day, I taught one of my strongest yoga classes. I wanted to build strength and detoxify the body of poisons. To remove the pain inside so it would not block me while I build power to move forward.
My students experienced the class individually. Each one dealing with their own challenge. Mine was loss.
Today, I sit here and still grieve because I miss my friend. But at the same time, I work on strengthening myself so I can pray for her family and friends to have the power to heal.
The power to BREATHE once again.
(in memory of Michal Aharonoff Ben-Rei)